[{"type":"general","setup":"Why are “Dad Jokes” so good?","punchline":"Because the punchline is apparent.","id":375},{"type":"programming","setup":"What do you call a computer mouse that swears a lot?","punchline":"A cursor!","id":435},{"type":"general","setup":"What do I look like?","punchline":"A JOKE MACHINE!?","id":188},{"type":"general","setup":"How does the moon cut his hair?","punchline":"Eclipse it.","id":136},{"type":"general","setup":"What was a more important invention than the first telephone?","punchline":"The second one.","id":262},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why do programmers always get Christmas and Halloween mixed up?","punchline":"Because DEC 25 = OCT 31","id":382},{"type":"general","setup":"Who is the coolest Doctor in the hospital?","punchline":"The hip Doctor!","id":297},{"type":"programming","setup":"What do you get when you cross a React developer with a mathematician?","punchline":"A function component.","id":412},{"type":"general","setup":"How do you get two whales in a car?","punchline":"Start in England and drive West.","id":125},{"type":"programming","setup":"I was gonna tell you a joke about UDP...","punchline":"...but you might not get it.","id":71},{"type":"general","setup":"What does C.S. Lewis keep at the back of his wardrobe?","punchline":"Narnia business!","id":22},{"type":"programming","setup":"A SQL query walks into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks...","punchline":"'Can I join you?'","id":23},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you know that protons have mass?","punchline":"I didn't even know they were catholic.","id":103},{"type":"programming","setup":"3 SQL statements walk into a NoSQL bar. Soon, they walk out","punchline":"They couldn't find a table.","id":369},{"type":"general","setup":"What is the least spoken language in the world?","punchline":"Sign Language","id":247},{"type":"general","setup":"What's the best thing about Switzerland?","punchline":"I don't know, but their flag is a big plus.","id":426},{"type":"programming","setup":"I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.","punchline":"They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.","id":399},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the bread factory burning down?","punchline":"They say the business is toast.","id":84},{"type":"general","setup":"Why can't you use \"Beef stew\"as a password?","punchline":"Because it's not stroganoff.","id":307},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear the one about the guy with the broken hearing aid?","punchline":"Neither did he.","id":100},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you watch the new comic book movie?","punchline":"It was very graphic!","id":66},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water?","punchline":"Because if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat.","id":351},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?","punchline":"Frostbite.","id":232},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do pumpkins sit on people’s porches?","punchline":"They have no hands to knock on the door.","id":350},{"type":"general","setup":"99.9% of the people are dumb!","punchline":"Fortunately I belong to the remaining 1%","id":398},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the crime in the parking garage?","punchline":"It was wrong on so many levels.","id":394},{"type":"general","setup":"Where do you learn to make banana splits?","punchline":"At sundae school.","id":288},{"type":"general","setup":"What's blue and not very heavy?","punchline":"Light blue.","id":265},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the barber win the race?","punchline":"He took a short cut.","id":315},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you do on a remote island?","punchline":"Try and find the TV island it belongs to.","id":226},{"type":"general","setup":"What's the best thing about elevator jokes?","punchline":"They work on so many levels.","id":269},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the spaghetti say to the other spaghetti?","punchline":"Pasta la vista, baby!","id":148},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why dot net developers don't wear glasses?","punchline":"Because they see sharp.","id":376},{"type":"general","setup":"Why are pirates called pirates?","punchline":"Because they arrr!","id":304},{"type":"general","setup":"What's the worst thing about ancient history class?","punchline":"The teachers tend to Babylon.","id":274},{"type":"general","setup":"Why does Waldo only wear stripes?","punchline":"Because he doesn't want to be spotted.","id":388},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a cow on a trampoline?","punchline":"A milk shake!","id":195},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call an eagle who can play the piano?","punchline":"Talonted!","id":219},{"type":"general","setup":"How come the stadium got hot after the game?","punchline":"Because all of the fans left.","id":115},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a cow with no legs?","punchline":"Ground beef!","id":56},{"type":"general","setup":"Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?","punchline":"Because he had no guts.","id":339},{"type":"programming","setup":"Hey, wanna hear a joke?","punchline":"Parsing HTML with regex.","id":395},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?","punchline":"A stick.","id":193},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a group of killer whales playing instruments?","punchline":"An Orca-stra.","id":209},{"type":"general","setup":"Why are mummys scared of vacation?","punchline":"They're afraid to unwind.","id":302},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a fashionable lawn statue with an excellent sense of rhythmn?","punchline":"A metro-gnome","id":204},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the fireman wear red, white, and blue suspenders?","punchline":"To hold his pants up.","id":323},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why would a guitarist become a good programmer?","punchline":"He's adept at riffing in C#.","id":14},{"type":"general","setup":"What does the mermaid wear to math class?","punchline":"Algae-bra.","id":393},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a careful wolf?","punchline":"Aware wolf.","id":194},{"type":"general","setup":"Why are fish so smart?","punchline":"Because they live in schools!","id":299},{"type":"programming","setup":"What's the best thing about a Boolean?","punchline":"Even if you're wrong, you're only off by a bit.","id":409},{"type":"general","setup":"How does a penguin build it’s house?","punchline":"Igloos it together.","id":134},{"type":"general","setup":"How does a train eat?","punchline":"It goes chew, chew","id":6},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the opera singer go sailing?","punchline":"They wanted to hit the high Cs.","id":332},{"type":"knock-knock","setup":"Knock knock. \n Who's there? \n Hatch. \n Hatch who?","punchline":"Bless you!","id":60},{"type":"general","setup":"What do prisoners use to call each other?","punchline":"Cell phones.","id":189},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a nervous javelin thrower?","punchline":"Shakespeare.","id":211},{"type":"general","setup":"If you see a robbery at an Apple Store...","punchline":"Does that make you an iWitness?","id":41},{"type":"general","setup":"Who did the wizard marry?","punchline":"His ghoul-friend","id":296},{"type":"general","setup":"What is a vampire's favorite fruit?","punchline":"A blood orange.","id":241},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a belt made out of watches?","punchline":"A waist of time.","id":4},{"type":"general","setup":"What's the best time to go to the dentist?","punchline":"Tooth hurty.","id":10},{"type":"programming","setup":"A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.","punchline":"A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.","id":364},{"type":"general","setup":"did you know the first French fries weren't cooked in France?","punchline":"they were cooked in Greece","id":31},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the belt go to prison?","punchline":"He held up a pair of pants!","id":316},{"type":"general","setup":"What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep?","punchline":"A stega-snore-us.","id":252},{"type":"general","setup":"How do you fix a damaged jack-o-lantern?","punchline":"You use a pumpkin patch.","id":123},{"type":"general","setup":"Where do young cows eat lunch?","punchline":"In the calf-ateria.","id":289},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?","punchline":"Supplies!","id":424},{"type":"general","setup":"What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?","punchline":"You can tune a guitar but you can't \"tuna\"fish!","id":270},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the coffee file a police report?","punchline":"It got mugged.","id":431},{"type":"general","setup":"What is a witch's favorite subject in school?","punchline":"Spelling!","id":242},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you know crocodiles could grow up to 15 feet?","punchline":"But most just have 4.","id":101},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the Mexican train killer?","punchline":"He had loco motives","id":91},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call cheese by itself?","punchline":"Provolone.","id":222},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call corn that joins the army?","punchline":"Kernel.","id":223},{"type":"programming","setup":"What is the most used language in programming?","punchline":"Profanity.","id":381},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the melons plan a big wedding?","punchline":"Because they cantaloupe!","id":330},{"type":"general","setup":"What is a centipedes's favorite Beatle song?","punchline":"I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand...","id":239},{"type":"general","setup":"What kind of music do planets listen to?","punchline":"Nep-tunes.","id":255},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the new restaurant on the moon?","punchline":"The food is great, but there’s just no atmosphere.","id":92},{"type":"general","setup":"What does an angry pepper do?","punchline":"It gets jalapeño face.","id":236},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why did the developer go broke?","punchline":"They kept spending all their cache.","id":438},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a fake noodle?","punchline":"An impasta.","id":203},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do bees have sticky hair?","punchline":"Because they use honey combs!","id":342},{"type":"general","setup":"Never take advice from electrons.","punchline":"They are always negative.","id":75},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the cookie go to the doctor?","punchline":" Because it was feeling crumbly.","id":434},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do trees seem suspicious on sunny days?","punchline":"Dunno, they're just a bit shady.","id":352},{"type":"programming","setup":"How do you check if a webpage is HTML5?","punchline":"Try it out on Internet Explorer","id":55},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the house go to the doctor?","punchline":"It was having window panes.","id":326},{"type":"general","setup":"Well...","punchline":"That’s a deep subject.","id":64},{"type":"general","setup":"Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper?","punchline":"Never mind...it's tearable","id":39},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call fake spaghetti?","punchline":"An impasta.","id":450},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you get hanging from Apple trees?","punchline":"Sore arms.","id":228},{"type":"general","setup":"How did the hipster burn the roof of his mouth?","punchline":"He ate the pizza before it was cool.","id":117},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a group of disorganized cats?","punchline":"A cat-tastrophe.","id":208},{"type":"general","setup":"I'm reading a book about anti-gravity...","punchline":"It's impossible to put down","id":37},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do mathematicians hate the U.S.?","punchline":"Because it's indivisible.","id":348},{"type":"dad","setup":"Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?","punchline":"In case they get a hole in one!","id":378},{"type":"general","setup":"Want to hear a chimney joke?","punchline":"Got stacks of em! First one's on the house","id":150},{"type":"general","setup":"Why can't bicycles stand on their own?","punchline":"They are two tired","id":5},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you get when you cross a chicken with a skunk?","punchline":"A fowl smell!","id":230},{"type":"general","setup":"I dropped a pear in my car this morning.","punchline":"You should drop another one, then you would have a pair.","id":57},{"type":"general","setup":"Where do bees go to the bathroom?","punchline":"The BP station.","id":284},{"type":"general","setup":"How are false teeth like stars?","punchline":"They come out at night!","id":112},{"type":"general","setup":"What did one wall say to the other wall?","punchline":"I'll meet you at the corner!","id":163},{"type":"programming","setup":"Where do programmers like to hangout?","punchline":"The Foo Bar.","id":17},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock?","punchline":"Look, no hands!","id":169},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do valley girls hang out in odd numbered groups?","punchline":"Because they can't even.","id":353},{"type":"general","setup":"How many apples grow on a tree?","punchline":"All of them!","id":137},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do chicken coops only have two doors?","punchline":"Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans","id":48},{"type":"programming","setup":"Which song would an exception sing?","punchline":"Can't catch me - Avicii","id":32},{"type":"general","setup":"A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, \"Wow, I've never served a weasel before. What can I get for you?\"","punchline":"Pop,goes the weasel.","id":78},{"type":"general","setup":"Why didn't the skeleton go for prom?","punchline":"Because it had nobody.","id":396},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a bear with no teeth?","punchline":"A gummy bear!","id":191},{"type":"knock-knock","setup":"Knock knock. \n Who's there? \n Cows go. \n Cows go who?","punchline":"No, cows go moo.","id":12},{"type":"general","setup":"How did Darth Vader know what Luke was getting for Christmas?","punchline":"He felt his presents.","id":116},{"type":"general","setup":"Why are oranges the smartest fruit?","punchline":"Because they are made to concentrate. ","id":303},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you get when you cross a bee and a sheep?","punchline":"A bah-humbug.","id":229},{"type":"knock-knock","setup":"Knock knock. \n Who's there? \n Opportunity.","punchline":"That is impossible. Opportunity doesn’t come knocking twice!","id":33},{"type":"general","setup":"What do elves post on Social Media?","punchline":"Elf-ies.","id":401},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why did the programmer go to art school?","punchline":"He wanted to learn how to code outside the box.","id":414},{"type":"general","setup":"I just watched a documentary about beavers.","punchline":"It was the best dam show I ever saw","id":40},{"type":"general","setup":"What's a computer's favorite snack?","punchline":"Microchips.","id":423},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call an Argentinian with a rubber toe?","punchline":"Roberto","id":218},{"type":"general","setup":"How can you tell a vampire has a cold?","punchline":"They start coffin.","id":113},{"type":"general","setup":"Why didn't the number 4 get into the nightclub?","punchline":"Because he is 2 square.","id":337},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the big flower say to the littler flower?","punchline":"Hi, bud!","id":167},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?","punchline":"Hare spray.","id":231},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the scarecrow win an award?","punchline":"Because he was outstanding in his field.","id":430},{"type":"general","setup":"What did one nut say as he chased another nut?","punchline":"I'm a cashew!","id":160},{"type":"general","setup":"How do you make a hankie dance?","punchline":"Put a little boogie in it.","id":127},{"type":"general","setup":"A grocery store cashier asked if I would like my milk in a bag.","punchline":"I told her 'No, thanks. The carton works fine.'","id":397},{"type":"general","setup":"How do you make holy water?","punchline":"You boil the hell out of it","id":52},{"type":"general","setup":"When is a door not a door?","punchline":"When it's ajar.","id":282},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the man put his money in the freezer?","punchline":"He wanted cold hard cash!","id":328},{"type":"general","setup":"Why does Waldo only wear stripes?","punchline":"Because he doesn't want to be spotted.","id":361},{"type":"programming","setup":"Knock-knock.","punchline":"A race condition. Who is there?","id":362},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do choirs keep buckets handy?","punchline":"So they can carry their tune","id":345},{"type":"general","setup":"What kind of magic do cows believe in?","punchline":"MOODOO.","id":254},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why don't React developers like nature?","punchline":"They prefer the virtual DOM.","id":411},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why did the programmer's wife leave him?","punchline":"He didn't know how to commit.","id":415},{"type":"general","setup":"Where do sheep go to get their hair cut?","punchline":"The baa-baa shop.","id":287},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a pile of cats?","punchline":"A Meowtain.","id":214},{"type":"general","setup":"What's the worst part about being a cross-eyed teacher?","punchline":"They can't control their pupils.","id":273},{"type":"general","setup":"Why are graveyards so noisy?","punchline":"Because of all the coffin.","id":301},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a fly without wings?","punchline":"A walk.","id":206},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?","punchline":"In case he got a hole in one.","id":427},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why do programmers prefer dark chocolate?","punchline":"Because it's bitter like their code.","id":416},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the half blind man fall in the well?","punchline":"Because he couldn't see that well!","id":325},{"type":"general","setup":"What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?","punchline":"They will give you a piece of your mind.","id":237},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the kid throw the watch out the window?","punchline":"So time would fly.","id":389},{"type":"general","setup":"What type of music do balloons hate?","punchline":"Pop music!","id":261},{"type":"general","setup":"What kind of tree fits in your hand?","punchline":"A palm tree!","id":257},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the tomato blush?","punchline":"Because it saw the salad dressing.","id":334},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a cow with two legs?","punchline":"Lean beef.","id":196},{"type":"general","setup":"What kind of award did the dentist receive?","punchline":"A little plaque.","id":250},{"type":"general","setup":"What's brown and sticky?","punchline":"A stick.","id":266},{"type":"general","setup":"What kind of shoes does a thief wear?","punchline":"Sneakers","id":9},{"type":"general","setup":"A termite walks into a bar and says...","punchline":"'Where is the bar tended?'","id":21},{"type":"general","setup":"Where does batman go to the bathroom?","punchline":"The batroom.","id":290},{"type":"programming","setup":"If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program","punchline":"the rest of them will write Perl","id":25},{"type":"general","setup":"Dad, can you put my shoes on?","punchline":"I don't think they'll fit me.","id":83},{"type":"general","setup":"How many seconds are in a year?","punchline":"12. January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, April 2nd.... etc","id":142},{"type":"general","setup":"What do ghosts call their true love?","punchline":"Their ghoul-friend","id":102},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why don't programmers like nature?","punchline":"There's too many bugs.","id":419},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the coffee file a police report?","punchline":"It got mugged.","id":319},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why did the programmer bring a ladder to work?","punchline":"They heard the code needed to be debugged from a higher level.","id":441},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the Red light say to the Green light?","punchline":"Don't look at me I'm changing!","id":182},{"type":"general","setup":"Where do hamburgers go to dance?","punchline":"The meat-ball.","id":285},{"type":"general","setup":"I got hit in the head by a soda can, but it didn't hurt that much...","punchline":"It was a soft drink.","id":68},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why did the functions stop calling each other?","punchline":"Because they had constant arguments.","id":406},{"type":"general","setup":"How does a dyslexic poet write?","punchline":"Inverse.","id":132},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?","punchline":"He was Bjorn again","id":392},{"type":"general","setup":"Hey, dad, did you get a haircut?","punchline":"No, I got them all cut.","id":76},{"type":"general","setup":"How many lips does a flower have?","punchline":"Tulips","id":8},{"type":"general","setup":"Finally realized why my plant sits around doing nothing all day...","punchline":"He loves his pot.","id":45},{"type":"general","setup":"What is the leading cause of dry skin?","punchline":"Towels","id":246},{"type":"general","setup":"What kind of dog lives in a particle accelerator?","punchline":"A Fermilabrador Retriever.","id":253},{"type":"general","setup":"Why was Cinderalla thrown out of the football team?","punchline":"Because she ran away from the ball.","id":373},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the submarine industry?","punchline":"It really took a dive...","id":95},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?","punchline":"There was nothing left but de Brie.","id":86},{"type":"general","setup":"Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?","punchline":"Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.","id":80},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why don't programmers like nature?","punchline":"Too many bugs.","id":440},{"type":"general","setup":"What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo?","punchline":"One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.","id":271},{"type":"general","setup":"Which side of the chicken has more feathers?","punchline":"The outside.","id":295},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why did the programmer quit his job?","punchline":"Because he didn't get arrays.","id":18},{"type":"general","setup":"What animal is always at a game of cricket?","punchline":"A bat.","id":153},{"type":"general","setup":"What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?","punchline":"I don't know and I don't care.","id":244},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?","punchline":"He had a very esteemed colleague.","id":94},{"type":"general","setup":"Why are football stadiums so cool?","punchline":"Because every seat has a fan in it.","id":404},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?","punchline":"In case he got a hole in one.","id":433},{"type":"general","setup":"Do you want a brief explanation of what an acorn is?","punchline":"In a nutshell, it's an oak tree.","id":107},{"type":"general","setup":"Why couldn't the kid see the pirate movie?","punchline":"Because it was rated arrr!","id":310},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the cookie cry?","punchline":"It was feeling crumby.","id":321},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a dad that has fallen through the ice?","punchline":"A Popsicle.","id":198},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?","punchline":"Damn!","id":172},{"type":"general","setup":"Where did you learn to make ice cream?","punchline":"Sunday school.","id":283},{"type":"general","setup":"What did celery say when he broke up with his girlfriend?","punchline":"She wasn't right for me, so I really don't carrot all.","id":158},{"type":"general","setup":"What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?","punchline":"A spelling bee.","id":157},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the chameleon who couldn't change color?","punchline":"They had a reptile dysfunction.","id":85},{"type":"general","setup":"If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you when you're in there?","punchline":"European","id":38},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you give a sick lemon?","punchline":"Lemonaid.","id":233},{"type":"general","setup":"Where does Napoleon keep his armies?","punchline":"In his sleevies.","id":292},{"type":"general","setup":"Due to complaints, Hawaii passed a law where you're not allowed to laugh above a certain decibel.","punchline":"You can only use a low ha.","id":403},{"type":"programming","setup":"How many React developers does it take to change a lightbulb?","punchline":"None, they prefer dark mode.","id":410},{"type":"general","setup":"What’s Forest Gump’s Facebook password?","punchline":"1forest1","id":277},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the butcher work extra hours at the shop?","punchline":"To make ends meat.","id":62},{"type":"general","setup":"Where do rabbits go after they get married?","punchline":"On a bunny-moon.","id":286},{"type":"general","setup":"Where does Fonzie like to go for lunch?","punchline":"Chick-Fil-Eyyyyyyyy.","id":291},{"type":"general","setup":"What’s E.T. short for?","punchline":"He’s only got little legs.","id":276},{"type":"general","setup":"Why didn’t the orange win the race?","punchline":"It ran out of juice.","id":338},{"type":"general","setup":"How do you make the number one disappear?","punchline":"Add the letter G and it’s “gone”!","id":385},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a crowd of chess players bragging about their wins in a hotel lobby?","punchline":"Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.","id":197},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did Sweden start painting barcodes on the sides of their battleships?","punchline":"So they could Scandinavian.","id":313},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a pig that knows karate?","punchline":"A pork chop!","id":212},{"type":"programming","setup":"What did the router say to the doctor?","punchline":"It hurts when IP.","id":366},{"type":"general","setup":"Why couldn't the lifeguard save the hippie?","punchline":"He was too far out, man.","id":311},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the left eye say to the right eye?","punchline":"Between us, something smells!","id":176},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a factory that sells passable products?","punchline":"A satisfactory","id":49},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear that the police have a warrant out on a midget psychic ripping people off?","punchline":"It reads \"Small medium at large.\"","id":97},{"type":"general","setup":"What’s 50 Cent’s name in Zimbabwe?","punchline":"200 Dollars.","id":149},{"type":"general","setup":"What did Romans use to cut pizza before the rolling cutter was invented?","punchline":"Lil Caesars","id":164},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the beaver say to the tree?","punchline":"It's been nice gnawing you.","id":166},{"type":"general","setup":"Do I enjoy making courthouse puns?","punchline":"Guilty","id":105},{"type":"general","setup":"How come a man driving a train got struck by lightning?","punchline":"He was a good conductor.","id":114},{"type":"general","setup":"What is red and smells like blue paint?","punchline":"Red paint!","id":243},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a dictionary on drugs?","punchline":"High definition.","id":199},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?","punchline":"Because they're so good at it.","id":355},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear the joke about the wandering nun?","punchline":"She was a roman catholic.","id":98},{"type":"general","setup":"What did Michael Jackson name his denim store?","punchline":"Billy Jeans!","id":159},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the rooster cross the road?","punchline":"He heard that the chickens at KFC were pretty hot.","id":391},{"type":"general","setup":"Why do bananas have to put on sunscreen before they go to the beach?","punchline":"Because they might peel!","id":340},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the scarf say to the hat?","punchline":"You go on ahead, I am going to hang around a bit longer.","id":183},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear the story about the cheese that saved the world?","punchline":"It was legend dairy.","id":65},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the cow who jumped over the barbed wire fence?","punchline":"It was udder destruction.","id":87},{"type":"general","setup":"What biscuit does a short person like?","punchline":"Shortbread. ","id":155},{"type":"knock-knock","setup":"Knock knock. \n Who's there? \n Little old lady. \n Little old lady who?","punchline":"I didn't know you could yodel!","id":13},{"type":"general","setup":"Want to hear a joke about construction?","punchline":"Nah, I'm still working on it.","id":151},{"type":"general","setup":"Did you hear about the hungry clock?","punchline":"It went back four seconds.","id":63},{"type":"general","setup":"What did the ocean say to the beach?","punchline":"Thanks for all the sediment.","id":178},{"type":"programming","setup":"Why did the programmer quit their job?","punchline":"They didn't get arrays.","id":437},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the cookie cry?","punchline":"Because his mother was a wafer so long","id":320},{"type":"general","setup":"What do you call a duck that gets all A's?","punchline":"A wise quacker.","id":202},{"type":"general","setup":"My older brother always tore the last pages of my comic books, and never told me why.","punchline":"I had to draw my own conclusions.","id":386},{"type":"general","setup":"How was the snow globe feeling after the storm?","punchline":"A little shaken.","id":145},{"type":"programming","setup":"What's the best part about TCP jokes?","punchline":"I get to keep telling them until you get them.","id":363},{"type":"general","setup":"Do you know what the word 'was' was initially?","punchline":"Before was was was was was is.","id":36},{"type":"general","setup":"Why did the math book look sad?","punchline":"Because it had too many problems.","id":422}]